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Archive for April, 2013

The Booty Poem

Posted by tpegonline on April 12, 2013

I overheard a conversation in the barbershop recently where a couple of guys were talking about songs that were written to pay homage to what the called “the all-powerful booty.” I got to thinking, “Hmmmm… Are there any poems written about the booty?” Well, now there is one!

I’m just having a little fun with this so don’t be offended or anything like that.

I’ll use various songs (mostly in the rap genre) the way I used candy bars in my poem Call Me Mr. Goodbar.

This poem is a hybrid of my triple rhyme style and standard prose.

Here is a playlist on GrooveShark.com that I created for the songs mentioned in this poem:

CLICK HERE for “The Booty Poem” Audio Playlist



“The Booty Poem”

© 2013 Tyrone Turner

All rights reserved

Honey bunny, you know that you got it stacked like IHOP.

I bet you keep a clean house and you cook-up good food while you Slap Chop.

You are a Shining Star and if you were on a shelf you would be on the top.

lookin' good cookin'


I’m sure that there is more to you than that ‘donk’ that you got.

But mercy, when it comes to junk in the trunk, you got a lot.

Any guy that gets to push up on that has struck it lucky like a leprechaun with a gold-filled pot.


I bet when guys are with their girls, they have to take notes from Rahiem Drinkwater and be on “Booty Watch.”

They’ll raise a glass to your gift and chug down a shot of scotch.

You’re doing great so you don’t have to ask like the late NYC Mayor, Ed Koch.


You make a brother wish he could say that The Girl is Mine.

You seem to be about your B-I and make Arab Money like Busta Rhymes.

When it comes to you folks can say She Got Her Own because you handle The Walking Dead like Police Officer Rick Grimes.


I can only imagine what cats would say to you in the club.

I’m sure they would offer to buy you a drink because they’ll be Caught Up like Chubb.

Fantasizing about putting you in that Hot Tub [of Love].


Below is what the average wannabe player would say.

He wouldn’t know what he’s saying because your cushion blinded him like Ray.

For you, it is the same old stuff, different day.


I’d like to get to know you better – “Damn! Baby Got Back!

You know you got a Big Ole Butt.

All I can think about was how I would like to see you Back That Thang Up and Shake It Fast because you have a real nice, soft, juicy one, Ms. Fat Booty.

buffie pink dress

You don’t have to put on fine lingerie to get my juices flowing. I’d prefer to see you in a wet tee-shirt and some Dazzey Duks.

You are looking mighty fine in that pink dress but I want to see that Booty Work.

38-24-37 like Bonita Applebum. Sweetie, Drop It Like Its Hot and Put It Down on Me.

That’s right…

Shake it like a Salt Shaker because you got More Bounce to the Ounce.

It’s all about Da Butt and watching you Wiggle It.

I hope that the DJ plays Rump Shaker and Shake That Ass Girl.

Just act like it is The Thong Song and make it do what it do and I’ll do The Humpty Dance.

Can we leave now and go somewhere and Let’s Get it On Tonight?

If I sound a little crazy just Blame It (On the Alcohol).


wasp waisted latina

Yep, you’ve heard it all before, but I just got to let you know.

There are a lot of women up in here tonight but you’re the star of this here show.

You’re like Vanity in the The Last Dragon and I’m Bruce Leroy because you give me that glow.


You sho nuff can Work It to the Bone.

That fatty of yours made that tower lean over in Rome.

This is an ode to that Fatty Girl called the Booty Poem.


CLICK HERE for “The Booty Poem” Audio Playlist


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